May 14 2008 T-shirt seller likens Obama to monkey

T-shirt seller likens Obama to monkey which was so George W. C- for originality.

Catcalling-- creepy or a compliment?
Busy travelers forget toddler at airport, fly on
'Fusion Man' soars above Swiss Alps- pretty cool footage of this guy with rockets and wings strapped to his back zipping around the alps.

nice pairings do not balanced reporting make:
Jack Black confirms: Twins for Jolie, Pitt
Actor tells House of newborn twins' overdose

Moore plans 'Fahrenheit 9/11' sequel
New movies make light of 9/11 attacks

I was cruising down 3rd st. near Larchmont today and a bunch of construction type trucks were lined up in the median for blocks. Possible protest action. If any one has information, please let me know.

May 13 2008 Feds: Girl, 12, trained to work as dominatrix

Certainly a bittersweet abuse. What tweenage girl has the opportunity to smack around mom's loser boyfriend.
And in other good bad news coverage today :

• Overweight nude to set art world record
• Woman fights bobcat, pins it to ground
• 1 in 3 workers hung over at the office
• Dad jailed after daughter fails test

May 12 2008 Skimpy Prom dress lands teen in cuffs

prom season coverage
I really like how CNN reporters asked this girl to model her "inappropriate" dress in a playground. Savvy.

May 9 2008 Teens tell police they converted skull into bong

Today's drawing suggested by Sarah Elated:

Teens tell police they converted skull into bong

The associated video is great. It's a blair witch style voice-over free sequence of a man stacking pieces of Willie Simms' headstone back into place. Then he washes his hands in a pool of stagnant water, which is foul and creepy since the article claims the coffin is at the bottom of this pool and officials are waiting for it to dry out before examining the corpse disturbance.

Some select sensational newslessness today:
Turning 50 prompts 75-pound weight loss
Drivers honk, scream to get $3.55 gas
Pals drive through 48 states in 106 hours
Kids' book calls pot 'just a plant'
Don't adjust monitor ... puppy IS green my fav because the lady at the spca is mildly chafed by the reporter's relentless attempts to sensationalize placenta/embryonic fluid fur tinting, which to her is really not newsworthy.
Your moms: Beautiful, fantastic, perpendicular
Accused pedophile a beloved Santa | Video

May 8 2008 Crop Circles Cause Mystery

Oh poor Mikey. He's so eager and enthusiastic in this clip as he reports on "cwop stircles". Very cute. Very sensational. Over the top with alliteration.

May 7 2008 University Drug Bust

"Operation Sudden Fall" took down 75 San Diego State students this week, some featured in this clip which looks more like a Tilly's Fall Preview Runway Show. Only 20 students actually face dealing charges, the rest mere possession.
One was just a month shy of earning a master's degree in homeland security and had worked with the campus police as a security officer. "O.S.F.", lauded by CNN and probably other networks as a massive campus bust seems in actuality pretty insignificant. All in all, they found what amounted to a lousy $100,000 (or a little over $5000 a person for the 20 "dealers" of the 96 arrested).

May 6 2008 Woman fights to keep 80 cats

What's Tuesday without bad animal coverage from CNN.com?
Woman fights to keep 80 cats

Also today a mess of foreign affairs reports to bolster Bushies stink bomb ratings:
Laura Bush on Myanmar
Bush on Myanmar
Bush freezes assets of state-owned Burmese companies This reeks of disaster capitalism. If the Bushies want to aid the people of "Burma," then simply, unconditionally help them. Don't take advantage of this disaster and reiterate your criticism of the government then ask that government to beg for our financial assistance, conditionally coupled with the admittance of the "U.S. Disaster Assessment Team" which will conduct analysis already underway by International aid organizations previously stationed there.

Leveraging crisis aid is despicable.

Just send in the aid. If you don't want to sign the check to Senior-General Than Shwe then drop off supplies to the International Red Cross.
It's obvious Bush doesn't care about genocide/human rights abuses (Begged congress for a Free-Trade Agreement with Colombia, embraced the Olympics in China, Loosened laws of torture and interrogation techniques, occupied nation under false pretense, ignored "obsolete" human rights definitions and denied rights to "enemy combatants" and on and on and on) so what's with the wild hair over "Burma" and what is actually in store for this nation in the wake of a natural disaster plus U.S.A.'s intervention.
It's pretty awesome that Bush can freeze assets of Myanmese companies. What if Myanmar froze the assets of Chevron, which funnels millions to the "military junta" each year through investments in the Yadana natural gas fields and pipeline. Or what if Bush cracked down on the oil company and forced them to actually adhere to the sanctions like all other U.S. businesses and pull out.

Cinco de Mayo 2008 Bleeding, greasy man stuck in vent

Bleeding, greasy man stuck in vent
Also enjoyable-
the ever studious ASU crowd strips down to "skivvies" for finals.
Atlanta uses taxpayer money for 5 $300,000 toilets. Further non-Cnn research reveals they were commissioned by Mayor Shirley Franklin and paid for from the Atlanta Development Authority's Homeless Opportunity Fund. This is amazing because the toilets only have a 2 year maintenance contract which means after that point they will either continue to funnel money to the unnamed "private company" or let them go into a state of unusable decrepitude much like the 5 toilets in Seattle that cost $700,000 per year to maintain. The toilets are only open from 7am-7pm, so couldn't the Mayor just subsidize rent for two years for a couple hundred people with the $1.5 million? I'm kind of surprised there isn't a similar federal scam for high end toilets in Iraq. I'm sure this too will come.

May 2 2008 Teacher says bikini caused her firing

Shell pulls out of wind farm. This wasn't a headline, just tucked somewhere in the bowels of CNN.com randomly displayed in the video lineup. It is, however, one of the best examples of CNN's blatant and enthusiastic disregard for integrity minimums and content driven journalism. An unbelievable clip that seems unfinished due to such non-commentary on a topic crucial to the moment. A major oil company pulls out of renewable energy as the peak supply of oil looms in the very near future and the cost has spiked. Yet CNN devotes all of 30 seconds in this 2:19 clip to any form of dialogue. The rest is an ambient VOID.
Teacher says bikini caused her firing
The reporter keeps mispronouncing the fishing boat company saying "Smoke um" instead of "Smokin' Em." This is one of two stories today (the other, Store bans Confederate flag truck ) that revolve around employers' rights to discipline the private lives of employees. It goes well with the video of the Mayor ousted for lingerie pics on myspace that has been listed and relisted on Cnn's most popular videos since February. "That's my space. That's why they call it Myspace." Umm. No. It's pretty much a public space, although post as you please.

May 1 2008 Mom-to-be charged with another DUI

Mom-to-be charged with another DUI
The reporters coaxed this girl out on the porch wearing just a night shirt only to video her crying with great emotion and embarrassment over the airing of her arrest video. Ruthless.

911 dispatcher falls asleep during call
This one's great because it includes Nancy not only fake snoring but also chomping down on her own fist as she waits for the correspondent to respond to a question regarding paid leave. Oh, and also bic pen manhandling.

Babies thrown off tower

. . . as they have been in India for 500 years as part of a traditional rite. So misleading, this headline. So fantastic, this video.