March 17 2008 Naked Man Runs Amok in Grocery Store

It's St. Patty's day and no where is it more apparent that workers are giving their absolute least than over at CNN.com, the diversionary news source. The headlines today were atrocious:

• Bodies of 4 men found in vacant lot
• Potty school really gets 'em going
• Shaken baby's dad says she is recovering
• ABBA drummer dies in apparent accident
• Tornado takes 'Mrs. Bonnie,' animal lover
• Ex-Beatle to pay $50M in divorce settlement

While in actual news Cheney makes a surprise visit to his Frankenstein, Baghdad, where he plans to twist officials' arms until they scream uncle and open all oil fields to international companies, you know, just to level the playing field. China blocks millions of potential YouTubers from accessing lip syncing teens and Tibet protest coverage. Reports claim that at least 10 civilians were burned to death and estimates of Tibetan deaths range from 30 to 100. And for those searching today for that pot of gold: Today We're All Irish: Debt Serfdom Comes to America.
So in un-news-worthiness today, a man runs naked through a grocery store in Pennsylvania. Cnn reporting takes a really creative angle flashing shots of produce and cellophaned meat products to describe naked body parts. Navel oranges anyone? Upon further non-Cnn research, I discovered that the most interesting part of the man's outing in the buff took place in a hotel, not the grocery store, where he drove a forklift into an interior wall (the article doesn't say how he got the forklift inside) and busted a sewer line. Naked!